established 2008

Media Training

Questions The Media Will Most Likely Ask You
by Joreth Innkeeper © 2009

Sometimes talking to the media is like playing a broken record ... everyone asks the same questions. Every once in a while, a reporter might surprise you and ask something totally novel, but when it's truly novel, there's no way to prepare for it. However, you can prepare responses to the questions you are most likely to be asked. Here are a list of the most commonly asked questions. You may want to copy and paste these somewhere and then write out short responses to them (more on how to answer questions in the following sections), and practice answering these questions. You can even find a partner to ask the questions to you so you can respond back.

  • How many partners do you have?
  • What are their genders?
  • Do they all know about each other?
  • How many live with you?
  • Which one is your main partner?
  • Doesn't anyone get jealous?
  • How do you handle jealousy?
  • Who sleeps with whom and/or how do you decide who sleeps with whom?
  • Do you all have sex together / at the same time?
  • Does your family know?
  • How did you tell your family?
  • When did you first learn about polyamory / know that you were polyamorous / experiment with polyamory / give up monogamy?
  • How do you deal with scheduling conflicts?
  • How do you handle knowing that your partner is with someone else?
  • How did you first meet your partner(s)?
  • Aren't you afraid of STDs?
  • What happens if someone gets pregnant?
  • How do the children know who their biological parents are?
  • Isn't polyamory immoral?
  • What do you get out of polyamorous relationships?
  • Why isn't one enough?
  • How can you call this a commitment if you're having sex with other people?
  • Do you think you'll ever settle down someday and just be with one?
  • If you had to pick just one, which one would you pick?
  • Which one do you love / love the most?
Franklin Veaux, co-writer of More Than Two offers his experience on the repetitiveness of questions that the media asks that you may find of interest as well.  He discusses what asking those kinds of questions means, and with that knowledge in mind, you may be able to better craft your responses to circumvent being taken out of context by addressing the meaning rather than the words of the question.  Understanding the bias of the person asking you questions goes a long way towards answering those questions in ways that are better understood and harder to take out of context, as we'll get into in the next section.

© PMA 2008